Vayishlach: Seeking the name of mystery

Parshat Vayishlach

Gen 32:25 - 31 

25. And Jacob was left alone, and a man wrestled with him until the break  of dawn.
26. When he saw that he could not prevail against him, he touched the  socket of his hip, and the socket of Jacob's hip became dislocated as he wrestled with him.
27. And he (the angel) said, "Let me go, for dawn is breaking," but he  (Jacob) said, "I will not let you go unless you have blessed me."
28. So he said to him, "What is your name?" and he said, "Jacob."
29. And he said, "Your name shall no longer be called Jacob, but Israel, because you have commanding power with [an angel of] God and with men, and you have prevailed."

30. And Jacob asked and said, "Now tell me your name," and he said, "Why is it that you ask for my name?" And he blessed him there.

31. And Jacob named the place Peniel, for [he said,] "I saw an angel face to face, and my soul was saved."

When Jacob asks the angel's name, the angel replies with a question. Apparently, Jacob never learns the name of the angel, even though he saw the angel face to face and received the angel's blessing. This is the reverse of Moses' encounter with God when Moses is in the cleft of the mountain. At that time, God told Moses that Moses can not see God's face, but that God will proclaim God's name before him.

In each of these encounters, the person is seeking to know the divine more deeply, yet the divine holds back from being completely known. The angel holds back telling his name. God holds back showing God's face. This reminds us that the closest encounter with the divine necessarily includes an element of mystery and of incompleteness. We are a finite vessel into which the infinite is poured, and we cannot contain the entirety of the flow. 

But although we can never know the divine completely, we can appreciate the desire that impels us to know the divine just a little more.

May we be blessed to have our unanswered questions and our unanswered desires fuel our search for closeness to and alignment with the divine.

Parshat Ki Tissa

Ex. 32:1-4.  And when the people saw that Moses delayed to come down from the mount, the people gathered themselves together to Aaron, and said to him: Make us a god who shall go before us; for as for this Moses, the man that brought us up out of the land of Egypt, we know not what is become of him.”  And Aaron said to them: “Break off the golden rings, which are in the ears of your wives, of your sons, and of your daughters, and bring them to me.”  And all the people broke off the golden rings which were in their ears, and brought them to Aaron And he received it at their hand, and fashioned it with a graving tool, and made it a molten calf; and they said: “This is your god, O Israel, which brought you out of the land of Egypt.”

After Moses fails to return down from Mt. Sinai for what seems like an interminable time, Aaron tries to placate the desires, fears and doubts of the people by making a golden calf.  In contrast to the wise-hearted people who were called to build and furnish the miskan and create garments for the priest following  precise and detailed instructions, the description of the making of the golden calf is remarkably brief.  It almost made itself, just like our ego-driven desires, fears, and doubts often seem to have a life of their own beyond our awareness and control.

May we be blessed to make the space and take the time to allow insight to arise so that we can be wise-hearted builders, rather than mindless slaves to our immediate cravings.

Bamidbar - listening to the wild "is"

 Parshat Bamidbar 

Numbers 1:1 The Lord spoke to Moses in the wilderness of Sinai…

God spoke to Moses “in the wilderness.” We can understand this to mean not that God and Moses were physically present in the wilderness, but that God used the wilderness itself to speak to Moses. We already know from Moses’ encounter with the burning bush that Moses was a very close observer of being-ness as he walked in the desert. This passage reinforces and extends the idea that insight is speaking to us from the very nature of the way things are.

Being in a wilderness is very different from being in a garden.  To create a garden, we work to shape nature to our own goals – food, or flowers or shade or a grassy place to sit.  In the wilderness, we abandon our human plans and give ourselves up to marveling at the awesomeness of creation. This passage teaches us that, rather than trying to shape our thoughts or emotions into some acceptable, pretty, and productive plan, we should simply pay close attention to the wild, spontaneous processes that move through our bodies and minds. Watching carefully and with loving acceptance, we may eventually discern the lessons that life is always teaching.

May we learn to be careful, quiet observers of the wild “is,” hearing in that wilderness whatever it is we need to learn.  

Parshat Chukas

Parshat Chukas:  Ch. 20:7-9. "And the Lord spoke to Moshe, saying, Take the rod, and gather the assembly together .  .  .  and speak to the rock before their eyes; and it shall give forth water .  .  .  And Moshe took the rod from before the Lord .  .  .  And Moshe lifted up his hand, and with his rod he smote the rock twice: and the water came out abundantly .  .  .  And the Lord spoke to Moshe and Aharon,  Because you did not believe in me, to sanctify me in the eyes of the children of Israel, you shall not bring the congrgation into the land which I have given them. "

What kept Moshe's from entering the promised land?  What keeps us from entering the promised land both physically and in our hearts?

Happy are those who dwell in your house.  May we be blessed to realize that while smiting the difficult places within ourselves us may bring temporary peace, lasting peace arises when we allow our minds to quiet sufficiently to hear the still small voice within and to speak gently to the suffering in our lives.

Parshat Beshallach – Wise response to fear

Parshat Beshallach – Ex. 14:13-15.  “And Moses said to the people: ‘Do not be afraid, make a stand, and see the salvation of the Lord, which He will work for you today; for while you have seen the Egyptians today, you shall see them again no more forever.  The Lord will fight for you, and you shall hold your peace.’ And the Lord said to Moses: ‘Why are you crying to Me? Speak to the children of Israel, that they go forward.’”

In the words of Rabbi Alan Lew (z’el), five steps of spiritual transformation are set forth in Moses’ instructions to the Israelites when they have their backs against the sea and to us when we feel trapped physically, emotionally, or spiritually:
Al teyrau – Do not panic.  Do not be afraid of illusions, phantoms, or terrors that are not real. 
Heetyatzvu – Stand still, face your fear, and let reality come into focus.  
Uru – See what is real. 
Tachareshun – Gather yourself.  Be in the present moment; and 
Vyesau – Get going.  

May we, like the Israelites, see our fears, know when to be still and when and how to take the next steps toward spiritual transformation.  

 Listen to Rabbi Alan Lew's talk.